It's a common question to ask children: "What do you want to be when you grow up?" And I answered that question a variety of ways in my "growing up" years.
Cowgirl.
Astronaut.
Engineer.
Meteorologist.
Architect.
Golf Analyst.
Regardless of the fact that I thought often of what career I would land in, I rarely thought about that career from the perspective of "purpose." I certainly never put those thoughts into words like "vocation." That all changed, however, when I graduated high school.
I was enrolled at Milligan College as a Communications major. I wanted to be a television broadcaster. More specifically, I wanted to be an analyst and reporter on the Golf Channel. Or, at least, that's what I said I wanted. I knew even then that the thought of having this career didn't touch my soul the way I desired. I couldn't have put it in quite these terms at the time, but I knew deep down that the life of a golf analyst would never be fulfilling to me because it didn't fulfill a grander purpose in life. But I didn't know how to search out that purpose. I didn't understand the nature of calling.
The summer before I entered college, however, I had a wonderful opportunity. One that changed my life forever. I had my first internship.
I interned with my Youth Pastor, Brandon. He invited me into the inner workings of the Youth Ministry. It cannot be overstated what this opportunity meant for me. What it did for me. Simply put, I fell in love.
I remember getting to teach for the first time. I taught on a chapter out of Ecclesiastes, which was a book that spoke to the depths of my own soul at that point in life. I was so humbled and so pleased to be able to teach our Youth Sunday School class on something that meant so much to me.
Teaching Sunday School and writing lessons and studying Scripture intently became a regular pattern for me. And for the first time in my life, it felt like something inside me clicked into place. Like I had found something I didn't even know I had been looking for. It felt like a homecoming.
The best part of the summer, and arguably the biggest event of the summer, was a Vacation Bible School the Youth Group put on for the Boys and Girls Club. We did it out of doors, in the park adjacent to the Boys and Girls Club main building. I had been put in charge of the curriculum for VBS, and I poured out my energies over stock curriculum after stock curriculum. Everything I found seemed so shallow and hokey. So I brought an idea to Brandon.
What if I were to write a new curriculum for us to use at VBS?
I don't know what made him agree to this. I had so little experience leading theological discussion and no formal training in theological studies. I had written one, maybe two, Sunday School lessons at that point. I had NEVER written a full week's curriculum. But he did agree. And I can't thank him enough for the faith he had in me.
I don't remember much about the VBS. I do remember that I planned everything in detail. Every one of the VBS volunteers and workers had a role to play that I helped orchestrate. I wrote out scripts and planned games and crafts. I thought through how to present the "Story Time" portion of the curriculum. Everything revolved around that Story. I covered the grand arch of the story of the Bible, and it all culminated in the story of Christ. The main message that I wanted to convey through every game, every craft, every story, was that God loves us. We are so, so loved.
I didn't have any theological training at the time, but I knew that much. I knew God loved those kids at VBS. And I wanted them to know that. The thought that I could be the person to tell them of that love... wow. For the first time, my life made sense to me. I had a bigger purpose, and it was one that made me excited for the future.
I changed my major before I even stepped foot on Milligan's campus for the fall semester. I knew after that summer interning under Brandon that my life could never be the same. I couldn't possibly carry on with this plan to work in television broadcasting knowing that something else was out there for me to do. I changed my major to Bible with an emphasis in Youth Ministry.
These days I read Scripture and pray with a lot more theological awareness. I have a great background in history. And through it all I have developed new ways of understanding my purpose and calling. But I know that without that summer interning under Brandon, I wouldn't be where I am today. That was the kickstart to a new life. One that is rich and full and bursting with purpose.